First Hit of the Season!

His first game was last week, but I am just now posting this. It's not a grand slam by any means, but here's Cade's first hit of the season with loud mouth mommy in the background!

Baby Parker

Cora is feeling better. It's taken awhile, but the leg pain has subsided and she has a bit more energy. So I think we're OK, until Monday. The hair is a disaster. It is shedding and falling out to the touch and I am just not sure what to do with it. So if you see my little girl looking fairly pretty raddgedy, please know we're doing our best! On a much more fun note, for the last two days Cora and I have had the PRIVILEDGE to babysit our 10 week old neighbor, baby Parker. Cora LOVES him! She wants to take care of him all by herself! He's such a perfect and cute lil guy! We've had a ball with him and the sandbox in his backyard!

If You Can't Say Something Nice, Don't Say Anything At All

I've been avoiding blogging in an effort to stay positive. The truth is, it wasn't a positive week. Cora has been in pretty bad shape this week. Poor thing feels miserable. She's been totally sick to her stomach which had her very dehydrated again around Wednesday so we had an unplanned clinic visit. Fluids helped some, but the truth is this Delayed Intensification is just destroying her little body. She is starting to really puff back up from the steroids, her hair is shedding like crazy, and she walks around all day crying that she doesn't feel good. Her legs are so sore that walking is hard and today she was complaing of low back pain on her right side. I know this is part of the treatment and it will pass, but it STINKS SO BAD! I hate watching my baby suffer and not being able to do one darn thing about it! All we do all day and night is try to comfort her, and I can't even tell you the amount of guilt I feel over this whole thing. I am not sure why I feel guilty???? But it seems to be my way of dealing, passing the heartache off as guilt. Being positive has been hard this week. In fact, when I read Cora Cinderella at bedtime tonight, it was probably the most cynical version ever told. Well, I didn't actually change the story, but I sorta felt like saying, "Cora sweetie, this is a fairy tale, it isn't real life. Happily ever after doesn't always exist!" That's just the kind of week it's been. I am hoping, this week the silver lining will shine through! We are DONE with chocolate medicine (steroid) as of today for awhile! Sorry for the "half empty" attitude I am experiencing today! The one thing that keeps us going is the huge number of people praying and encouraging us! We love you!

SCPS Photo Shoot

Two adorable and awesome photographers from Ohio came to SCPS a few weeks ago to do a photo shoot. They are incredible! Cade and Cora both got to take part along with some good friends of ours! What a sweet slide show. Makes me want to go to school there!!! Click on the title above to view the slideshow.

Sweetness

This is what made me cry today.

It was one of the sweetest things I have ever seen in my life. The director of Cora's former school called and said that she had something for Cora. I picked it up today. It was an envelope from a little girl who we don't know and she doesn't know us. Her name is Raiyan. She is six (I think). She doesn't even go to SCPS, but her little sister does and they have been following Cora's blog since diagnosis. They pray for Cora. Raiyan had a birthday party and decided that she didn't need any presents. In lieu of gifts her friends gave her checks to Cora's Medical Fund. She made Cora a card and there was a card from this precious family as well. I am in awe of this little girl's generosity. What kid gives up birthday gifts to help someone else??? This speaks volumes of the kind of family she comes from. I pray that one day Cora will have a heart that is this generous. I feel so guilty taking these checks. We are going to try to find a special way to show this little girl how grateful we are. Raiyan, we will be sure that your birthday money gets put to work. Our prayer is that we won't need to use it and can bless another family with it the way you have blessed us! Thank you so much!

No Tears Clinic Visit

Yesterday (Monday) Cora visited the clinic. This visit was monumental because she did NOT cry! She didn't even sit on my lap when her port was "clicked." They access it with a tiny needle hooked to the tubing. She did make some yucky faces, but who wouldn't. She was such a big girl. The PA even made the comment, "Wow, she's really come a long way!" She has! Her counts were still good. Her ANC was 2351, down from 6000 last week, but still OK. She got the same two chemo drugs she's gotten the past few weeks, and we went home! She is back on the steroids this week so she is feeling pretty yucky. We don't go back for two weeks, but when we do it will be a doozy! She will have to have a lumbar puncture (chemo in the spine), a new drug called Cyclophosphamide, and begin a new oral medication, and a new (at home) subQ injection. That will be fun! I'm pretty nervous anytime she gets new meds. When you read the list of possible side effects it is scary! Here are some of the rare, but possible side effects of Cyclophosphamide:
- heart muscle damage
- damage and scarring of lung tissue
- A new cancer or leukemia resulting from this treatment
- damage or scarring of urinary bladder tissue
- severe allergic reaction that can be life threatening
- infertility

Nice, huh? I think anyone would be scared about giving that to their child. I just wanna skip that day, but she has to have it! Dr. J also told me that after the meds coming up soon we can probably kiss the hair goodbye. Which makes me crazy since we are so close to maintenance phase. This nasty treatment just makes me want to do everything in my power to help improve cancer research so these little ones don't have to go through all of this. On the other hand, I am SOOOOOOO thankful for these nasty drugs that kill an even nastier disease! It's a very weird thing. Pray for our visit in 2 weeks!

Grocery Store Chat

Clinic was fine today. Cora's ANC is sky high (which is great) and she got her vincristine and doxyrubin through her port. We like uneventful visits!

My highlight of today was the chat we had as we were checking out in the grocery store line. This is what I love most about having kids. It went something like this...

Cora: I love that pink balloon. I want Aunt Lauren to buy me that pink balloon for my birthday.

Mommy: OK, we will tell Aunt Lauren to buy you that pink balloon on July 10th.

Cora: Can I have a cell phone?

Mommy: WHAT? No way, you can't have a cell phone until you can pay for it yourself!

Cora: When I grow up can I drive a car?

Mommy: Sure you can, you need to tell your daddy that you want him to buy you a car when you grow up.

Cora: I will tell him I want a hot pink car!

Mommy: That will be pretty!

Cora: Can I be a cowgirl when I grow up?

Mommy: Sure, baby, you can be anything you want. You can be a cowgirl, a ballerina, a princess, a nurse, a doctor, a teacher, whatever you want.

Cora: I just want to be a cowgirl and a houselady.

Mommy: What does a houselady do?

Cora: She just cleans stuff and folds stuff and cooks stuff.

Mommy: Is mommy a houselady?

Cora: (emphatically, as if to say duh) YES, you are a houselady and daddy is a houseboy. Houseboys cut down trees.

:)